Day 8: July 14, 2008

Today was our first day of camp at the Gisimba orphanage here in Kigali. Oh, how we longed for our young mountain children with their sweet simplicity and ready amazement! But the Gisimba children are every bit as dear - I think perhaps it was only that we were not quite prepared for the change. We had roughly 100 children, a good portion being both taller and older than the two youngest members of our team (ie: We had teenagers. Lots of them.). Music transcends age and cultural differences, so I think I had the easy job. Sitting there on my bench in the pink cafeteria (I have no idea why they picked that color), strumming my guitar with my now amazingly calloused fingers, and listening to the Africans sing . . . But it was difficult to see the rest of the team struggling. Abraham and Barnett never missed a beat. While the rest of us came to the end of the day shaking our heads and wondering what went wrong, they remained forever positive and encouraging. As Abraham tells us over and over again, “We cannot fail!” And indeed, by the grace of God, we have not.

This is actually my very first time being in an orphanage and working with the children there. I already have fallen in love with the children, but the VBS-style camp we are doing, while quite a lot of fun, is not the sort of work I want to do permanently. I love to befriend the kids and laugh with them and share music, but the time is too short. I want to tell them over and over again how much Jesus loves them - how precious they each are . . . I want to know their hopes and fears and dreams - and do everything in my power to point them down Your road for them. One week is not enough.

I would be in a heartbeat the mother - the sister - the friend these precious children never had . . . but I cannot stay. Jesus, I want to show them - to have the chance to tell them that You are the father - the mother - the friend - the brother they never had (or lost in the genocide), and You will be with them always. This is my heart: to share with the children that You will never leave them or forsake them. That love - Your love - never fails. With such a message, I could go to all the children of the world. Because though I might have to leave them, You never will!

During a talk about futures yesterday, Abraham encouraged me to pray that You would make absolutely clear to me Your will for my life - Your place for me. And that Your place would include everything I have - my love of children, the horses, art, music, photography, traveling, writing. I’ll give them up for Your glory, or I’ll use them for Your glory - whichever You prefer. To spend my life - exhaust my life - for the sake of Your kingdom, for the sake of Your children - this is my desire. Dear Jesus, lead me on.

The precious little children.