Tonight I am scribbling these words out on a scrap of paper because I am a good three-hour drive from my journal, and I cannot read my Bible because it is temporarily MIA as well. I’ve left the whole lot of them in my stuffed backpack (along with things like clean clothes and shampoo) at the orphanage in Kigali. Oops. For myself, I am no longer in Kigali. I am way up high on the Rwandan mountainside, preparing for our first day of camp tomorrow. I do not know that I have ever felt so deserted before - so forsaken - and I can imagine it is but a taste of what the Christians in some countries feel when their Bibles are forcibly torn from then and destroyed before their eyes. I also can better appreciate the motives of those who fill prison walls with their mental ramblings. I feel like a vital part of me is missing.
And then I was flipping through my guitar music (which I do yet have with me) and I read these words: “Your love is amazing, steady and unchanging/Your love is a mountain firm beneath my feet.” And You, God, reminded me that in the midst of this loss- almost as though a dear friend had died! - that it is You. It is You, it is You, and it is You alone - and that is all I need. If that is all I have, then that is more than enough. I must say, I do not like being here in this village way up in the breathtaking mountains without my Bible - my journal - and other niceties like my toothbrush. I do not want to socialize with people either. I want to sit in a corner until I feel better - more in control, more able - less deserted. But You have not - and will not desert me. You prove Yourself faithful in all things, and You are proving Yourself faithful again. Who expected such a lesson in this place?! I pray that You bring my things here quickly and safely. But in the meantime - or if I do not see them again till Saturday, when we return to Kigali - You are with me. You are faithful, oh my God. Please help me to remember that.
P.S. Thank You for seeing that my camera did come with me. I am deeply grateful for the ability to take pictures!
Sunrise in the breathtaking Rwanda mountains.
The hills surrounding our little school in the valley.
The guest house where I stayed, for two nights and three days, without anything but the clothes on my back, my guitar, and my camera. One clarification: We were housed in the brick structure, not the wooden one. :-)
Sun setting beyond the mountain road.
